IntroductionThe colonial
There is a combination of higher social class, abuse and loneliness. There is split between the higher and lower social classes where the upper-class is using and sometimes abusing the lower social class. One form is colonialism. But it can also happen in higher classes using lower classes in one society. They feel they have class, culture, art and science. They feel special, the ones who have to organise the world, not just normal workers. They feel better with a kind of haughtiness. It is as if they are entitled to use the normal workers. Often they can do that with a kind of benevolence for their servants. But sometimes it can really go to abuse.
They have a desire to live luxuriously without problems. They like to be taken care of and live a pleasant and enjoyable life. And others, servants, have to take care of them. They like to be served with food, care, alcohol. They like to enjoy sex.
Work.They do not like to work. They feel more that things should be given to them, that they are entitled to them. They like the lazy life. The most they want to do is just some managing and administration. For the rest they are more interested in culture and art. They prefer to read and watch movies instead of doing hard work.
FamilyThey can be very alone. They have difficulty making a real relationship and starting a family. Even when they have a family they live as separate people. Their wife does different kinds of things and their children are often raised by the servants. It makes them feel very alone. They have secret relationships with servants because officially that is an impossibility as it would ruin the hierarchy. When children are born from such relationships they are seen and treated as bastards. They cannot really be officially accepted.
They can easily have children with other women. They like to play with servants and underlings. But they do not like to recognise the offspring as theirs. Their children become bastards. Maybe they can feel guilty but they will suppress this because they do not want to give up their easy life.
Self-worth.They have a problem with their self-worth. They know they are unique and deserve to be treated as such. But on the other hand they are unsure about themselves, so they cannot really stand up for themselves. They fight for equal rights out of theoretical motives but lack the inner strength to take their stance.
MindThey feel part of the system but think about leaving as it does not give them enough love and respect; they feel special, but are lazy in an outsider position.
Confusion between being and having.
Unappreciated, as a human being, as a woman, as an intelligent person.
Desire to be creative, artistic, scientific.
Anger, rage, fury, held in or expressed, < too many demands, being rejected, humiliated, insulted, degraded, subordinated.
Sadness, depression, < being rejected, having failed, being unloved, humiliated, degraded.
Apathy, indifference from having the feeling that one’s goals cannot be reached.
Reaching, longing for connection, others.
Desire for beauty, art, music, dance, literature, science, philosophy.
Desire: spirituality, meditation, sacred feeling of the world.
Sensitive, soft emotional, loving, less technical, live for the day.
They identify themselves by money and possessions.
Delusion being incapable.
Feeling guilty.
Confusion between having and being.
GeneralDesire: alcohol.